Paid in full

 Verse of the day today is from Bible Gateway’s Verse of the Day;

John 10:28-30

New International Version

28 I give them eternal life, and they shall never perish; no one will snatch them out of my hand. 29 My Father, who has given them to me, is greater than all[a]; no one can snatch them out of my Father’s hand. 30 I and the Father are one.”

Who knows you? The real you? The you that is flawed and broken? The sinful ugly you, entirely? There is probably one person you might have shared all the nitty-gritty 100% truth with. Generally, that is because of shame, fear, and embarrassment, to name a few. However, God knew that we would be unable to meet the criterion for perfection. Especially, knowing it the moment Eve bit the “apple” ie. forbidden fruit. 

Rabbit hole: {I never thought of this like this till now, can you image being condemned for eating a fruit. (I know she wasn’t condemned for simply eating the fruit, bare with me). The thing I do want you to think about is, you know how when you’re dealing with your own sin, and you are in your head space saying “well my sin of …… isn’t as bad as the sin of …. and trying to justify your own sin? Next time you do that say “well is it as bad as eating an “apple”? The heart of Eve’s sin was disobedience, deception and corrupting others (bringing Adam into her sin, yes he had free will to say no). So, look at what the heart of your own sin is. God, does not judge things the way we do, by human standards, He judges by the plum line of Himself/Christ Jesus, we all fall short, because we ARE NOT PERFECT, but we can be perfected- meaning we cannot do it alone, we have to allow God to perfect us. Which is hard, if you didn’t already know.}

        God knew, we would fail and He still provided us a life line in that of Christ Jesus. Do you ever just sit and think about the price that was paid for that life line? Beyond the Easter and Christmas times of the year?  And, do you truly think about the price paid even then? I have found that in different seasons of my life, I have forgotten to put Jesus in the correct placement as Lord of my life. I have just gone through the motions of the routine of having God in my life ie: going to church every time the doors were open, being involved in teaching Sunday school and other ministry aspects, but simply going through the motions without  giving God my all. 

        I can tell you that I have hurt a lot of people, most of the time it was unintentional and without a plot to cause damage, but the damage still happened, still remains. Do you know what boggles my brain? God still loves me. The people I hurt most definitely do not love me, like me or forgive me… the damage is done. I can ask for forgiveness, but the damage is still done, a scar will always remain. Yet, no matter how far a believer might fall, they can’t be taken out of the Father’s hand.                 

        When we believe in God, He should be the Lord of our lives. We should be aware of what we do, think, and go with God. Remember He never leaves or forsakes His children… So, where are you taking God? What is He experiencing with you? Are you proud or ashamed of where you are taking Him? Are you being the hands and feet of Jesus or are you being a stumbling block or enjoying your sin?

May God Bless y’all

Lifesaver

         Isn’t it strange how you can see something one hundred times or more, but you never really see it or pay much attention to it. Especially, if it is not something you use everyday or need every day. Well, today as I was walking I looked over to the pool and thought about our lives comparatively. Keep in mind that the Bible verse that I had read  earlier was “For the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God” 1 Cor. 1:18. 

        Now think about your day, so far have you prayed? Have you thanked God for your blessings? What about reading your Bible? Or spending some quality time with Him? Have you, really? If not, stop and do so now, if you read the verse above and count that as having read the Bible, that is fine, but read it again, think about each and every word. What is the point of the verse? Well, if you have been reading my blog you know that I generally do a BRP (Bible Reading Plan) from Sunday School book and then, dive into the finer meaning that I gleaned, at write about it here on my blog. I am still doing the BRP however, Brian and I have been doing those as a part of our prayer and Bible study together of late. Yet, I still read and try and have time daily, alone with God too. Again, I am not perfect, but I am trying to be perfected.

        OKAY. Now let’s dive back into what I opened with the swimming pool and our lives comparatively.

        So, how many of you have a lifesaver at home. How many have a functioning lifesaver hanging on the wall in your living room ? I am going to go ahead and guess not many. Why? Why do you not have a lifesaver hanging in your living room? Well, most likely it is because your living room is not nautical themed or it isn’t filled with water. Which are both very good reasons not to have a lifesaver hanging on your living room wall. Now, think about a pool, especially a public pool did you see a functioning lifesaver there? Did it make sense for it to be there? Absolutely, as we don’t want to be unprepared in case of a drowning. We want to be able to help someone, or for someone else to be able to save them. As a former lifeguard I can tell you that when someone is drowning they don’t stop and think ooops I am drowning. Nor, do they scream out for help. When someone is drowning they thrash around like a mad person, flailing their arms around trying too grab on, clinging to anything that will save them. Even when an aid is offered to them it can take a bit for them to realize there is help and all they need to do is grab hold and they are safe. They will cough and cough to regain their composure and to clear their mouths and even throats from the water they absorbed. The first thing a lifeguard does is know how to swim, show that they can swim and tread water, take a CPR/first aid course/ and learn what to do in an emergency. Then, as a lifeguard they watch, listen and enforce pool safety measures. Do you think the lifeguard is supposed to jump in and grab a thrashing drowning person? No, they are advised to get to the person and offer them the flotation device, trying not to get to close, till the person has calmed down or sunk to render aid. Now, did you know that even at the Olympics there is a lifeguard on site watching the Olympians swim. That kind of seems crazy and overkill to watch professional athletes who expertly know how to swim, but it is necessary. Emergencies are not something that someone generally plans to do, they are more often than not accidents.

        Likewise in our lives we never really plan for Emergencies to happen or accidents to occur. Sometimes tragedies strike from out of no where, and we struggle with the AHHH’s and Why me type questions and mentality. Well, just as a lifeguard must be prepared to aid those around them in need of aid or rescue, so we too must be prepared for life. Our form of preparation comes through prayer, Bible reading, quality time with God and fellowship with other believers. That way when we see others around us, in need of aid we can help them. And sometimes send them the lifesaver so they can be saved. God is our ultimate lifeguard and lifesaver. He asks for the faith the size of a mustard seed, which isn’t very big is you didn’t know. When we trust God as our lifesaver we know longer need to thrash around, especially if we stay close to Him. He is there to help us in any way especially in times of crisis. However, if we spend our time doing things that aren’t smart, danger lurks. We find ourselves thrashing around in the woes of life, like we don’t know who’s we are. We want to continue to search for things other than the Lifesaver to help us, and then we drown in our selfishness, pride and sin. God then, reaches in to save us. Cleans us up, dries us off and tends to us, as we allow Him too. God will not force His help on us, but He will be there when we are tired of drowning and trying to do things our own way and in our own strength.

        As you go about your life day to day, don’t just have a random lifesaver hanging needlessly on your wall. Have the Lifesaver that knows you inside out, and is always there. Spend time with Him and know Him as well as He knows you. He will meet you where you are, you don’t have to save yourself, dry up and clean off (fix all your imperfections) He will meet you RIGHT, WHERE, YOU, ARE! Simply ask.

Just some me, yakking

             Do you ever find yourself trying to be your best self, yet, constantly thinking “ahhh I missed something.” For me these days are way worse than others. It is often hard for my brain to stay on track from one moment to the next. Well, I have been trying to be a better me for a while, but have to constantly start over. However, at the end of October I went to my doctor and when I saw the weight on the scale I looked to make sure it was only me on the scale. “AHHHH! What happened!” I can tell you that some of it was do to a bit of “woah is me” and some of it was “oh, well” and other parts of me were obliviously happy that I just didn’t care. My husband, Brian always builds me up, so part of me was just content to be me. I didn’t really physically feel that I had put on so much weight as I am constantly registering on the pain scale, somewhere near miserable. Yet, I was getting to be a bit snug in my clothes. Anyway, I had a wake up call about then that God was not done with me yet. I had been ready for God to say, “Okay, come on home you have suffered enough.” Well, being as I am not a ghost writing this, I figured I better ask GOD what I needed to do. As, HE Is Not DONE with me yet. Often, we get caught up in “I don’t sin as bad as so and so” or “at least I am not committing such and such sin.” Last time I checked the Bible it said to pull the plank out of your eye, before to point the splinter out in somebody else’s (paraphrased). Well, that is when I started praying and asking God to help me to be more in His image and mindset, especially when it came to food and snacks aka, what I put into my body.

         I remember my whole childhood, watching my Grandma struggle with her weight, we would walk to the oldies with her, or do the home exercise videos, and eat the diet of the month or what have you. However, as hindsight is 20/20, I know there is no magic cure, especially ones that don’t have ridiculous side effects. While I was in Jr. and High school I stayed active and decently healthy, I remember trying to fit or wanting to fit in my friends size 0-1 pants HA! That was and will never happen, even if I were just bones, they will not fit into a 0-1 sized pant. I did track, shot put and discus, power lifting and other things. I remember at my smallest squeezing into a size 9 pants that were my friend’s baggy pants, (that was kind of the style then). Ladies at church would ask me if I was anorexic, classmates would ask if I needed an intervention. No, I was just working out a lot and burning off all the calories I ate. Going, going, going. I had a couple of horrible accidents that kept me from doing the athletics any longer so I had to stop. When I went to college I did aerobics but that didn’t help much, if any. I was bogged down with how to get all the information in my head in order to pass.

        My here and now self has been tired and pushing through the pain to again be what I need to be. This time I am trying to stay Christ focused in my healthier me endeavors. I am trying to be less sedentary regardless of how I feel. There are still days that I cannot physically do it, on those days I must show myself grace. I have to do for me what Christ does, show Grace. God doesn’t expect perfection He desires for us to allow Him to perfect us. He is really good at His job too! I know that because I would have already hit the smite button a million times on just me alone. Whatever you are allowing God to work on you, show yourself a little grace. Ask God questions, He is big enough to handle our questions and unbelief, He is also faithful and just, so give Him time to answer. Do not confuse God with a magic Genie 🧞‍♂️  as He is not one, for that I am oh so glad.

He is not done with you yet!

If you are lonely and single- pray about it

If you are childless- pray about it

If you are a drunk, on drugs, an atheist or someone who doesn’t believe in Christ pray about it!

Whatever He is telling you to work on, PRAY!

In all things, give it to God- trust that He knows what is best, even if it isn’t what you wanted or how you thought your story would go.

TRUST IN THE LORD WITH ALL YOUR HEART, AND DO NOT RELY ON YOUR OWN UNDERSTANDING; THINK ABOUT HIM IN ALL YOUR WAYS, AND HE WILL GUIDE YOU ON THE RIGHT PATH- Prov. 3:5-6

Man, that fit right in with what I was talking about, God is good like that. He put that on my heart the perfect verse. Notice how the Bible doesn’t say with some of your heart…… it says WITH ALL YOUR HEART! Whew! That can be hard to do, but do it. HE WILL Guide you….. Not, He will leave you to flounder around on your own. So, be careful to remember that, God is always with us. Are you allowing Him to guide you or are you taking Him to places you wouldn’t even take your Mom or Grandma? 

What a mighty God we serve! He sees past all, ALL my failures and loves me still. If, you didn’t know, the cat is out of the bag! I am not perfect! But I am trying to be perfected.

If there is a way I can pray for you, as you journey through this life let me know and I will pray with and for you (always pray for yourself too).

May God Bless,

Christiy

Be careful little mouth what you say…

 BRP 1 Peter 3: 8-18-20

Sorry, I have been MIA hence the long BRP verses. I have been doing the daily readings just a break from technology and slight illness- vertigo/headaches. Anyway here we go. I will go ahead and post the verses, from the NIV- Bible.

Suffering for Doing Good

8 Finally, all of you, be like-minded, be sympathetic, love one another, be compassionate and humble. 9 Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult. On the contrary, repay evil with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing. 10 For,

“Whoever would love life
    and see good days
must keep their tongue from evil
    and their lips from deceitful speech.
11 They must turn from evil and do good;
    they must seek peace and pursue it.
12 For the eyes of the Lord are on the righteous
    and his ears are attentive to their prayer,
but the face of the Lord is against those who do evil.”[a]

13 Who is going to harm you if you are eager to do good? 14 But even if you should suffer for what is right, you are blessed. “Do not fear their threats[b]; do not be frightened.”[c] 15 But in your hearts revere Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect, 16 keeping a clear conscience, so that those who speak maliciously against your good behavior in Christ may be ashamed of their slander. 17 For it is better, if it is God’s will, to suffer for doing good than for doing evil.18 For Christ also suffered once for sins, the righteous for the unrighteous, to bring you to God. He was put to death in the body but made alive in the Spirit. 19 After being made alive,[d] he went and made proclamation to the imprisoned spirits— 20 to those who were disobedient long ago when God waited patiently in the days of Noah while the ark was being built. In it only a few people, eight in all, were saved through water,

Essentially, this is self explanatory. As I read some of the commentaries for the later verses I was intrigued at how strange people have viewed and translated verses 18-20. I will not go into detail as to what I read, but I encourage you, that as you read the Bible 1. Read the verse(s) in context 2. Read with Prayer and Supplication for God to reveal the meaning and connotation of the verse(s) 3. If something is confusing reach out to your pastor (Call or text them, the question(s) that you have. Then, ask them if they can meet up to discuss the verse(s), or if they can direct you to where they like to research with) {Don’t always trust Google or internet based searches as they are not necessarily Biblically astute, or sound}

I hope that you are all well, till next time.

(Pt 2)

 BRP 1 Peter 3:7

A lot of times we get frustrated that the Bible doesn’t word things or state things the way we want them to. So what! We have all our lives had things just out of reach, or seemingly not go to our best advantage. Yet, we must remember all the Biblical people of the past, they went through their own hardships and trials. I am sure that during the midst of struggles and storms of life they were flustered, or didn’t understand.

So, ladies yesterdays verses may have been unfair, even today you might not like what is said, but hang on and let’s see.

In this verse it is He is addressing Husbands

Be considerate 

Treat her with respect

As a weaker partner

As heirs with you in the gracious gift of life

So, that NOTHING hinders your prayers

Now lets take each of these and look at them (Bible and Websters)

Be considerate - what do you think considerate means? Thoughtful of the rights and feelings of others. This is not a request from God, but rather a command/covenant

Treat her with respect- again this is an important part of a husbands command/covenant between Him, the husband and the wife (a cord of 3 is not easily broken)

As a weaker partner- This does not give license to treat your wife as a subpar nor like a slug or underling. Ladies,  if you really think about it men were made and built differently than women. They cannot carry a baby to term, as not only do they not have the proper reproductive organs, but their bone structure is not conducive to carrying a child. God has perfectly created a space where He can knit a baby in the mother’s womb, where the hips and bones can adjust to such a miracle. That is often why women’s pain tolerance is greater. So, take heart that you were fearfully and wonderfully made, in the weaker status of humanoid’s. Men, were made with broader shoulders, backs and form as well as endurance. 

As heirs with you in the gracious gift of life- remember in their culture women were essentially property, they were actually bought with a dowry, often times without the wives consent to be a wife to that husband. So, in retrospect this is a bold statement, they are essentially joint heirs with their wife. Not superior as we think. 

So, that NOTHING hinders your prayers- If you don’t abide in the command/covenant you might miss out on blessings or God’s favor.

                                                        Brian and Christiy

(Pt1) Women submission

 BRP yesterday’s verses were 1 Pet 3:3-4 and today is 1 Pet 3:5-6

Wives their appearance and humbleness, submission, and like Sarah.

These verses are pretty self explanatory. Do not be gaudy, and don’t nag your spouse for things to make you look haughty. (Yes, I know women have careers now a days and you can buy your own things, but there is no need to overdo your look) In the words of a friend of mine “modest is hottest”- Marilyn Talley.

We should not let our outward beauty trump our inner beauty. Whether with crazy elaborate hair styles, makeup, or attire. We should let God radiate from within us, a gentle and quiet spirit- these are of great worth to God. This is the way of the Holy women of the past, submissive to their husbands. Just as Sarah did with Abraham. Do what is right, do not give way to fear.

Tune in to the next blog….. Don’t be to flustered till you see the next one.

God’s blessings

 I will do my BRP in a minute further down

        Have you ever had a moment where you hear someone’s story, or testimony and thought to yourself how are they able to receive God’s blessing or why does God answer their prayers and not my own? Well, first off the only person we should compare ourselves to is that of the Trinity, Jesus. Secondly, we can’t see the big picture of what God has in store for us. Yes, we know the end of the overall story, God wins. Have you ever realized what life would be like if Jesus had been the same way? Yes, Jesus asked questions of God the Father, because He had a relationship with Him and God is big enough to handle any question we might have. Jesus, also went about it in the proper way, through prayer. Everything Jesus did was to set an example for us. Well, today when I was listening to someone’s testimony about the healing of her son she said God chose to heal Him through prayer, He also may heal through modern medicine or He may heal through calling the person home.

      I went to do my BRP and was led to look at something else first that of Isaiah 53:5-6. I want to breakdown this scripture a bit and want to not just skim over it. (Go and read the verses now, I read the NIV and HCSB) Also, used Miriam Webster’s Dictionary and Thesaurus.

He was pierced for our transgressions (crime, offense, sin, violations, felony, trespass, wrongdoing, misdeed, error, breach, debt, lawbreaking, malefaction, and the list goes on)  Yowza that is a list! 

We often want to put thing in less than to greater than type of sin. Ex. In my eyes stealing a piece of candy, knowing it is wrong, is worse than murder. However, God has His standards, His plumb line, and all sin is equal. Anything that separates us from God is sin. So, when you see transgressions in this verse know that it in capsules all SIN. Yikes, so I am as evil as a murderer? Yes.

He was crushed (visualize this) for our iniquities (Corruption, evil, sinfulness, depravity, wickedness, vileness, ill, badness etc.) Yowza, again. 

Crushed- almost beyond recognition, I find myself so unworthy. Iniquities- to be described as any of these words might make you feel unworthy too. The price that God paid through Jesus, I find myself wanting, needing to be more like Christ. 

The punishment that brought us peace (tranquility, rest)

It is mind blowing to think that Jesus had to endure all this in order for us to have peace. I again, do not feel worthy of such a high priced gift.

By His wounds we are healed (repaired, mended)

WOW! What an amazing, un-repayable gift. We are healed, from sins curse! Does that mean you will never have trials like cancer, No. However we know we won’t be alone here on Earth as we suffer. Even if we don’t receive healing in this mortal body, we know that God has a healed immortal body for us.

We have all like sheep gone astray (off the path, in error) turned to our own way.

I definitely am guilty of this.

The Lord laid on Him the iniquities of us all (every single person’s sin was paid in full by Christ Jesus, even though some will refuse His gift)

    DO you see here why we should be ever grateful of the gifts God has for us? The great price that was paid for us?

This is why it has been so important for me to get my house (myself in order). Christ did not pay the costly wage of my sin so that I could just Willy-nilly live my life how I want, I must look at the plumb line that God has set before me, in every aspect of my life, starting with the inner me. So, I encourage you to do the same. Be a believer in Christ, not just by words but by doing his will.

BRP is 30th 1Peter 2: 24-25 and 31st 1Peter 3:1-2

    The verses at the end of chapter 2 tie in with the things I said above. “He Himself bore our sins, in His body on the tree, so that we might die to sins and live for righteousness;  by His wounds we are healed. For you were like sheep going astray, but now you have returned to the Shepherd and Overseer of your souls.

    The verses 3:1-2,

    We are to submit to Christ male and female; husbands and wives. We are to submit to God, a husband who is in right standing with God will be a devoted man who submits to God will and guides with a loving  hand. However, a woman should submit to God so that even if her husband is lost she will be a witness unto her husband. She can by her witness and submission win him over without  her words, but by her deeds and behavior.

    Submit to God! All else will fall in to place God is good.  

Do as I do (Jesus)

 BRP 1 Pet 2:22-23

22) He committed no sin, and no deceit was found in His mouth. 23) When they hurled their insults at Him, He did not retaliate, when He suffered, He made no threats. Instead, He entrusted Himself to Him who judges justly. (NIV)

WOW, the perfect example of do as I do! I am not sure I would have been silent. Thus it reminds me of Peter, they came to take Jesus away and he was like “over my dead body”, (as he pulled out His sword) and chopped the soldiers ear off. Jesus, is like woah, woah, woah “this is not the way” (as He puts the soldiers ear miraculously back on). {This whole section is definitely paraphrased} 

We want to go in all guns blazing, even if we have never fired a gun before. See Peter is so relatable here. He sees the most unjust thing to ever happen on Earth, and wants to do something about it. He goes on to deny Christ 3 times publicly, and he is a common ordinary man- a husband and a fisherman. However, we know he was a fisherman first, then God called Him as a disciple and missionary. We can relate here in the south to fishing, I do catch and release mostly as I do not care for eating fish.  See there are points to grasp from ole Peter in correlation to this book and these particular verses, when he wrote this it was after the death/resurrection of Christ. Think of it too as he, Peter, severally messed up and this is what He gleaned/learned from it. He isn’t using hypothetical situations he is telling of what he experienced, the things he now knows he should have been doing all along. Doing as Christ did. You see the commonalities we have with Peter? He was a plain ole Joe, from the working class, he wanted to do what was right though he didn’t always go God’s route about it, he denied Christ as we do in one form or another- even more than once. But listen here! GOD IS NOT DONE WITH YOU YET!!!! You might rebel you might get frustrated and mad, YET, GOD IS NOT DONE WITH YOU YET! He meets us where we are, even if we make stupid choices, say stupid things (I should substitute ignorant with stupid as my nephew is having to work on not saying stupid). Regardless, of where you are- whether you feel unworthy -not good enough -or that you have slipped to far Just say to yourself or aloud GOD IS NOT DONE WITH ME YET!!! He doesn’t expect perfection He expects us to be willing, willing to change and grow, which means dear child, to be pruned and disciplined and and these come through pain and trials.

Stay ever close to God so that you to can be commended, you can stand strong in Him. Remember He is with you and working all things to His GLORY, for those that are called according to His purpose.

Privileged to suffer

 BRP 1Pet 2:21

       I do not know about  you, but I have rarely thought, said or prayed “Thank you God for my suffering.” Yet, here Peter we were called to suffer, Christ gave us His example of how to suffer and exalt God at the same time. The commentary in my (NIV- Study Bible- fully revised by Zondervan- 1984) states that we should count it a privilege. Yowza, a privilege ?!?!?! That seems a big ask, doesn’t it? He wants us to “patiently endure as it is a part of God’s plan, Christ suffered for us- thusly we should instead of seeing and feeling it as misery, count it privilege” (NIV)

     I think one time in my life did I ever during my misery, exalt God. I wouldn’t have even realized I had done it except someone commented on it. I was in the ER with kidney stones, the first time, I was miserable and in a lot of pain. She commented something along the lines of “how I kept God in my mind and singing to Him through my pain.” I knew that in that moment I was doing things the right way, but I didn’t realize, as I have had to rely on GOD’S strength to get me through a lot already. Now, I know I have made many poor choices and not exalted God in all things, yet I do know He has made beauty out of my many messes. I have had trials that were not a punishment, but a chance to rely on God and grow ever closer to Him. There have been trials that had me frustrated and mad at God, and you know what I found out, GOD IS BIG ENOUGH, He handled my failings, He met me when I was done being a brat thinking it wasn’t fair, He was able to take my burden and remove it when I was no longer able to carry it. You see that is one of the many reasons I love God the Father. He meets us where we are, when we cry out to Him, we might not see it during the storm/trial, although we can feel Him, when the storm is over and we reflect on it we can see how God’s hand guided and protected up through it.

Here is some of the things I went through whether by choice or a God given trial:

Mental abuse

Sexual abuse, as a child by adult(s) -around people others knew were abusers.

Torture- as a child by peers

Spanked- for telling the truth

Several auto accidents, never my fault

Fear of STD/AIDS (I didn’t end up having either, but scary still)

Rebellion- ran way from home, drugs- marijana, drinking hard liquor, wine coolers all underage drinking. Smoking underage, sexually promiscuous underage- I felt it was all I was good for, adultery, 

Miscarriages 

Lack of motherhood 

Loss of potential adopted children, 3 days before I could legally fight for them.

House broken into

Loss of my dogs, one got out when the house was broke into, he got run over. Another 2 dog were ran over at different times several years apart. Another died from some strange mass in the back of her throat.  

Divorce

betrayal- my best friend dating my recent ex. I dated a guy who an acquaintance had dated.

Friends and family killed before their time- in my way of thinking 

And more but that is all I will put for now, the point is this, stuff happens. Our question is will we foolishly rely on our self  or will we trust God. Regardless of the storm, we have to choose who we will serve, who we will rely on. Only Trust Him only trust HIM!

Close and commendable

 BRP 1 Pet. 2: 19-20

Have your ever prayed for patience? God has a way of helping us to learn patience, through trials that require us to do just that…have patience. Often we will feel it is a daunting task that we regret praying for. Not because we don’t want to honor God with our learning of patience, but because it can be extremely difficult to grow closer to God in this way. He wants our trust, wants us to depend upon Him. Yet we are weak and unable to do a lot on our own.

In these verses He wants to remind us to ever be close to Him. That way we can stand strong during the trials, tribulations in this world, as well as learn to cling to Him during those times. The reason why God wants us to rely on Him, is because we can do a lot of things in our own strengths just as the lost do. Yet, when we cling to and exalt our Savior through the trials beyond our human strength, He gets the glory and we are commended by Him and our relationship is closer to Him. Even in our punishments of life we still can cling to Him, (I think of my dad saying, “This is going to hurt me more than you.”) He knows what is best for us and what will shape us into His image. He never said that molding us would be easy, but He did say He was with us though. So, when it is time for you to receive your “spiritual spankings,” for your wrong doings cling to Him. When you are in a season getting beat, whether literally or by the storms of life, know that God is with You. That is why we are to pray without ceasing, to have time with Him daily, and spend time in the Holy Word of God. Allow Him an active place in your life.

Remember that of Job. If you haven’t read his story or haven’t in a while go and read it. Then, think back to what I just said.

God, loves you and longs for the relationship with you that brings Him honor and glory.

 BRP 1 Peter 2: 18

This verse as an American is troubling to me, it says that slaves should submit with fear to their masters, not just the good masters but to cruel masters too.

I have seen documentaries and heard tales from people that were African American slaves. Some have stated how the “white masters” would quote and with misrepresentation use the Bible’s verses dealing with slavery. The African Americans were severely mistreated, beaten, raped, torn from their families and who knows what all other kinds of humiliation and troubles they dealt with. We know from History class they were murdered, had their homes, and churches burned. Even after slavery was abolished they still dealt with a lot, and were not treated as equals to the whites. There are some places still that are very cruel to minorities.

Can you imagine having to submit and standby and/or serving a master that had murdered your child or spouse? I can’t! I have had a couple of unfair bosses in my day, but none compare with what these slaves dealt with. When we read the word of God there is a reason for all words spoken or given. Even if the words we read are hard to swallow, it is our duty to understand the reasoning, the context and outcome. You see when we face trials and have to submit we are in good company as the Lord, Jesus submitted to the authorities of the day, which in the end made for His death upon the cruel cross. Now, He submitted even though He could have called legions of angels to His rescue, or had God take it all away and curse us all to Hell. Yet, he humbled Himself as a servant, His captors and killers didn’t know the end of the story and how God would ultimately WIN. We know the rest of the story, death did not keep Jesus, He conquered death and came alive again. We never know either how God will use our trials to bring Him honor and glory. So, whatever you are facing remember God is with you in all things.

Respect to all/freedom and more me

 BRP is from 1 Peter 2: 16-17

    When we here free a lot of times we are like, “WOO HOO!” “I can do whatever I want, when I want and how I want! YES!” But! Rewind… wait… stop! Before you go having those woohoo thoughts and moments there are things that need to be considered. Our freedom ends, where someone else’s begins. A professor of mine Mary Lewis, demonstrating this in our class and quite frankly shocked the room. She stood in front of a very tall, muscular basketball player and stated “Your freedom ends, where someone else’s begins” as she made the statement she seemed as if she was going to hit that basketball player right in his face, she stopped very close to his nose. Though we were shocked, it drove the point home, I still remember it today and that was 20+ years ago. Our freedom has boundaries, our freedom has consequences, our freedom is a gift.

    We are all grins and giggles about being free, which to a certain extent is great. We should, to a point, rejoice in our freedom as they came at heavy costs. Maybe not to you specifically, but freedom is not free, it has/had a cost. Jesus lost His life, and was beaten- nearly beyond recognition- so that we can be free from our sin. Does that mean that we should take the gift of Freedom, that He gave us and hide behind it our “secret” sin or our un-confessed sin? No! God wants us to live lives above reproach. He does not want for us to hide behind the cross our short comings. I guarantee someone already knows the sin, or it will come out. I can also tell you God does not sit on His throne with a smite button to strike you down each and every time you or I fall. He has love and understanding, grace and mercy, because the price that His Son Jesus paid was very costly.

    We are called to be servants of God. Which means we must show the proper respect that is due. That means to EVERYONE, not just our mom and dad, He says to EVERYONE. I can tell you from experience that this can be very hard. I know for those who love me, it has been very hard and at times very costly. (I will explain more about that in a second). We must respect everyone our siblings in Christ, our fellow believers. We are called to fear God, yes, fear Him, reverent, formidable and yet reassuring fear. GOD is Love and therefore He Loves Jealousy. As a husband loves His wife. As a mother loves her children. He longs to keep us near and protected, but He allows us free will to choose. Now we must decide what we will do with our Freedom. Live to grow closer to God and honor Him with our words deeds and actions or turn from Him.

Okay, here is something about me.

    I have been on this Earth for more than a couple decades. Yet, I am just now seeing me. Not the me I hope to portray, but the real me. I mentioned a moment ago that it is/has been hard for people that love me to love me. That is because I shut down or run. I find that my whole life has been this way, I just didn’t see or recognize it completely. I was fine living in my own little world as a kid, or retreating inside myself. I was not big on playing with kids my age, most of the time. I was generally okay when it was just me and my siblings (I have cousins that to me are like siblings, I truly have two sisters and I am the middle), However, other children and extended family were often harder for me. For some reason when there is a group of children they will pair off, whether by age, gender and or commonalities of some sort. When it came to this, I remember either choosing not to group and being picked on or not being picked by a person(s) to pair or group with and being picked on. I think I was in Junior High before I found people that I liked to hang out with, but that didn’t last long as they wanted more and different types of friends where I was content with what and who we were. Anyway, I am a horse of a different color, I generally was one to do what I wanted and hangout or run with who I wanted. 

[Back story: I was abused as a child, by adult(s) and curious with peers, that crossed lines that children should not cross. I honestly can handle, mentally, the curiousness of peers, but not adults, as they know better. Anyway, I won’t get into anymore detail about that currently. However, one other note, there was pornography available at our finger tips, mostly in tons of magazines in the wash house but also “professionals” on video tape.]

    Anyway, I think that due to a lot of my back story and being extremely sick as a child, made me the horse of a different color as I had to survive in the world I was raised in. This was my normal so I had to adapt, I also have a lot of autistic tendencies too. Especially, tactile items and textures and crowds- I tend to sit on the sidelines or miss events that have them. When I go to my Dad’s side of the family’s reunion, I am the opposite I just keep moving and talking and going to each group to say hello, that’s what my dad has always molded for me to do there, so I guess that is why I still do it. Although, I didn’t go to last years as I knew I did not have enough energy to go, go, go. 

    All that to say, I am unique, I am every learning myself and allowing for change. I am still not a hugger, nor do I think that will change. I am trying to be molded by God and in His image. NO< I AM NOT> PERFECT. I mess up daily. But, I am learning me and how God can use me. When things get tough I have been a runner, but I am trying to remember to RUN TO GOD. I retreat inside my shell, but I am trying to RETREAT TO GOD. He understands me more than anyone on this Earth ever could. He has allowed me to have a husband that truly tries to understand me, who doesn’t raise his voice or hands at me. I know that not everyone likes that my husband and I are together and some have reason not to like it. I know that God can make beauty out of our messes and grow us where we are as we are. We are trying to do that. Any way I am grateful that Brian loves, respects, honors and has compassion for me. He listens even when there are no words spoken, he just knows….. which is mind boggling to me. If God can use a donkey He can use me, He can use Brian our worts, flaws and all.

Seek not to be Perfect but Perfected by God.

Free, yet

 The weekend BRP are from 1 Pet 2: (11-12), (13-14 ), & (15).

I have been taking a break from technology for the most part, except to jot here in my blog. That is why I didn’t write here on Saturday, I did do the reading just didn’t type up the reflection or thoughts that came to mind. Till today.

    Before I start, I will begin with we joined a different church, yesterday. We have been visiting for over a year, it is where my Aunt needs to be, so we decided we should grow where we are planted, and currently God has us planted at NCBC. Now, before you ask, no, my Aunt is not the only reason we joined, but it did weigh in. Anyway, if you are not an active member, of your local Christian Church, getting spiritually fed, I recommend you pray about it. If you have never been to church before, visit and/or call the church. Even, if you have to leave a message on a machine or voicemail. When you listen to the message or when they call you back ask these 3 questions or see if these 3 questions were answered 

    Number 1- Do you preach about Jesus, and how he died and rose for my sin?

    Number 2- Do you support missionaries?

    Number 3- Will I be welcome? (Don’t describe yourself, or anything about you, simply ask and listen to               the answer).

    Now you may wonder why these 3 questions here is why:

    Number 1- All things in the Holy Bible, Old Testament or New Testament point to Jesus, His Death and His rising from the dead to pay for our sin. If they answer anything differently then hang up, that is not where God wants you. If they say yes to all parts then go to question 2

    Number 2- If they yes ask them how they support missionaries. They should list at least one local mission and at least one foreign mission. If they say No. Then hang up as they are not following scripture. This is not where God wants you. If they say yes and list a local and foreign mission that they help then go to question 3

    Number 3- If they ask any questions at all, even, “why do you ask?” Hang up, or if they say anything besides yes, absolutely……. Let me tell you why they should say Yes, because Jesus said “come unto me.”  He Himself dined and interacted with all sorts of people, meeting them where they were and where they are. You do not have to be “perfect” to attend church. The church is essentially a hospital, in the since that we all need help from “Dr. Jesus”.

    Remember, Jesus is the one who calls people to Himself, so if you have called, listened to the greeting on a voicemail, talked to a preacher or someone who answered the phone at church, or even googled the church and they meet all these questions. BE THERE ON SUNDAY MORNING OR WEDNESDAY NIGHT FOR SERVICE (SUNDAY SCHOOL). God is probably calling you!

Now to tell you what was laid on my heart, besides those three questions.

    Living a good life, is not according to worldly standards, but to God’s standards. He is wanting us to live our lives away from sinful desires. What specific sinful desires do you think He means? ALL Sinful desires, as sin separates from God. We can’t fully know what God has in store for us if any sinfulness separates us. Now that is not saying that you can lose your salvation, it is saying that you cannot know, nor fully grasp all that God has in store for you, nor can you grow exponentially with sinfulness ruling you. We are to live good lives so that we can be a witness, and our good deeds will bring glory to the Father to further help the lost. Then, when God calls a lost sheep or a lost soul to Himself, we can rejoice and be ready to welcome a new sibling in Christ, or one returning from wandering.

    Free.We are free! In Christ we are free. Yet, God tells us to respect the authority of those in power over us. In America, that is President, Vice- President and all the politicians that were elected to power. Regardless of whether or not we agree with them 100% or 0%. It does not matter as God has them in places of power over you. They are there in places of power because God wanted a judicial system to keep checks and balances over the people of Earth. 

    We are to do good so it will silence the fools. The Bible says that the tongue is sharper than a double edge sword. So, be careful and mindful of what you say with it, it can bring death. The saying “Sticks and Stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me,” is wrong. Our very mouth can shut the ears of the lost, there by ensuring their condemnation to Hell. I don’t know about you, but I would hate to be the person who is responsible for a lost person, going to Hell, ever separated from God the Father. I honestly can’t tell you if I have already condemned people there by my words, or by my actions. I won’t know till I stand and answer for all the deeds I have done. All I know is I have to do better, the lost need me to do better.

    Think about you, and your relationship with God. Will you hear Him say, “Well Done! My Good and Faithful servant” or “depart for I never knew you.”  Now, before you get to gloomy remember as long as you have breath in your lungs and a beat in your chest, GOD IS NOT DONE WITH YOU! You still have a way to God, Repent. You still have a way to God, Trust. You still have a way to God, JESUS!

Go find the Light that is Jesus. Then, go and tell others about Him, who is the light.

Chosen- received mercy

 BRP 1Peter 2:10

      Again, I am floored that when I look at the Bible verse by verse, and contextually. I am humbled and amazed. I can say that even verse by verse taking God’s word to heart, it does not always seem to make sense nor apply to me. However, God did not call me to have perfect knowledge of all that is said in the Bible. He does ask me to be faithful in reading the Word, having daily time with Him and to tell others about Him and His saving Grace. I am not perfect at any of the things that God asks of me or desires from me, but I am trying to be better at them. I am nowhere near perfection, simply a sinner saved by grace.

    Today’s verse is kind of self explanatory, but I feel it is great to reflect on. We as sinners were a lost people, going nowhere quick, all we did was in vain and self-derived. We were bound for the hot place, and I don’t mean Texas or Arizona, but Hell. We did not see, nor did we care to see where the path we were on was straight to Hell. We were content to roll around in our sin filled ways, often without a care in the world. Wide is the pathway to Hell and narrow the way to Heaven. We were staying off satan’s radar on that wide path of seemingly perfect bliss. It wasn’t until we realized that God was calling us to a higher purpose that we saw just how far we had fallen. I know for myself I was ashamed of my old self, every time I fall or slip below God’s standards I am too. I know that I am unworthy to be before Him yet, He wants me. I have a list of sin that could make a sailor blush, but my identity is not in my many faults, they’re in my redeemer Christ the Lord. He washed me and cleansed me, no matter how many people wish He would smite me off the face of the planet. I have wished He would smite me too, But GOD in His infinite wisdom is not done with me…. I am not sure why, but He isn’t. I long to be forgiven by everyone I have hurt whether knowingly or unknowingly. I wish I could ask each and everyone for their forgiveness, yet, I know that the apologies would fall either on deaf ears or on ears that have moved on. I have found that, most of the time when I am tripped up on my misgivings’ that I am the only one who’s ever been affected by the deed(s) and others have moved on. I am an over thinker though, and I want to seek forgiveness. Yet, how cruel and selfish would it be for me to ask forgiveness from someone who could careless, or has made strides to heal from any and all damage I have done. So, I leave my hurts and longings for forgiveness in the hands of the Father. I am trying to listen intently to what God would have me to do in regards to being forgiven, as of now I am trying daily to be right with Him and allow Him to direct me. IF you are reading this and need an apology from me, please know I am probably beside myself wondering how to make things better or I am oblivious to the fact that I have wronged you. Feel free to private message me on Facebook, if we need to discuss a wrong I have done, and allow me the opportunity to seek forgiveness.

    If you have wronged someone be in prayer for how to go about fixing the situation. If you have been wronged do the same, someone might not be aware that they have offended you, be in prayer. Remember, this life is hard for everyone, even Jesus had a rough go whilst here on Earth. Try and show grace and even mercy to others. Forgive as God has forgiven you, even if it is hard. I know for a fact that forgiveness is hard to do, even when they’ve been a monster to you. Also, be careful of collateral damage, example, if I have hurt you don’t take it out on my sisters, parents, family or friends. Tomorrow is not promised, but eternity is. Where will you go, who will be there too, whether you like it or not. So, do all you can to forgive. Lay your burden’s at the feet of Jesus, and know that He will guide you. Show grace and Mercy to one another as He has given you.

An heir, Chosen

 BRP 1 Pet. 2:9 & bonus reading today in Dan. 1:1-21

    Hey, I am tired and a bit cloudy mentally, but I will share today, just my thoughts. First the BRP thoughts. Have you ever really sat down and thought about whom you belong; not as a slave who has no free will, but as a free child of GOD. A royal son or daughter? Not an underling, a prized heir- a son or daughter! We are to inherit from our Heavenly Father, who chooses to share His riches and glory with us. CHOSEN, a Royal priesthood, a Holy nation! WOW!!!! I am not sure if I would want me if I were God. He has forgiven me time and again and I am so not worthy. Yet, He in His infinite wisdom knew and knows every fault and sin I have or will ever have. He could hit the smite button and say I am done with you, but He hasn’t. For the simple reason He is not done with me yet. We get to proclaim His praises, because He is the ONE who called me/you out of darkness, and into His marvelous light. WOW! 

    When you are singing at church or at home are you proclaiming? Do you think about the words that come out of your mouth, do they ever cause you to tear up? I try to be intentional about what I am singing/proclaiming, though sometimes I do run in auto pilot. When I catch myself doing this I try and close my eyes and think about the words, and then truly proclaim them. The song popping in my head now is Tis so sweet to trust in Jesus. I sometimes think, if I proclaimed the words of songs as loud as I sing them God might use the words to bless another. 

    Let me share the words of a song that always overwhelms my soul, in a good way. Read each and every word especially if you listen to the singers Philips, Craig, and Dean sing it. Then savor each word.

Your Grace Still Amazes Me

My faithful father
Enduring friend
Your tender mercy is like a river with no end
It overwhelms me
Covers my sin
Each time I come into your presence
I stand in wonder once again

Your grace still amazes me
Your love is still a mystery
Each day I fall on my knees
'Cause your grace still amazes me
Your grace still amazes me

Oh, patient savior
You make me whole
You are the author and the healer of my soul
What can I give you?
Lord, what can I say?
I know there's no way to repay you
Only to offer you my praise

Your grace still amazes me
Your love is still a mystery
Each day I fall on my knees
'Cause your grace still amazes me
Your grace still amazes me

It's deeper, it's wider
It's stronger, it's higher
It's deeper, it's wider (it's deeper, it's wider)
It's stronger, it's higher (it's stronger, it's higher)
Than anything my eyes can see

Your grace still amazes me
Your love is still a mystery
Each day I fall on my knees
'Cause your grace still amazes me
Your grace still amazes me

    Most often when I perform this song, I do it in ASL, sign language. I will tell you why. 1. I generally blubber if I try to sing the song as it impacts me so, being a daughter of the most High, baffles me to tears. And 2. Praising God by shutting my mouth and praising Him in song with my hands. I am generally honored that God, in spite of me and all the wrongs that I have done, Chose me, Chooses me, Loves me and shows me His Amazing Grace and Mercy daily.

If you have a song that bless you to your very core share it with me, I am not sure if blogger will allow you to do it anonymously, but know I won’t bug you about it. I just want to see if I have heard it and listen to it, regardless if I know it. Here is another one you should listen to, Just as I am, listen to the words and pray them back to God.

Walking or Stumbling

BRP 1 Peter 2:7-8

 Cornerstone- 1. A stone forming a part of a corner or angle in a wall specifically: such a stone laid at a formal ceremony 

2. A basic element: Foundation

Capstone- 1. A coping stone : coping. 2. The high point : crowning achievement.

A cornerstone is the base, our foundation which all other stones refer to for perfect alignment. Where as the capstone is the final stone to be added. Think of a pyramid, the point at the top. The capstone can also be referred to as the keystone that keeps the rocks together, think of a rock arch. 

I just like to have definitions handy whilst reflecting on the word of God so that I might grasp the full intent or meaning behind the verses. Biblical scholars debate the exact interpretation of these words and the context. However, it is essentially are you being used by God according to His purpose, or are you be tripped up on the nuisances that allow you to stumble.

At the end of the day you need to know 1. There is the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit. 2. We were created by God (the trinity) 3. We fell short of God’s glory and now have a sin nature that separates us from God 4. We could not atone for our sins without blood sacrifices, so God sent His Son, Jesus to live a perfect life, so that He could be our perfect sacrificial blood offering. 5. He died 6. He rose again 3 days later allowing us a path to God the Father. That is the heart, the meat of the Holy Bible, everything in the Old Testament points to Christ and so does the New Testament. All other aspects of the Bible are generally revealed by having a personal relationship with God. This is why time in prayer, scripture reading, fellowship with believers and being active in church are so important. So, if you are reading this and you do not know God and Jesus as your personal Lord and Savior ask questions. If you know that you are ready to follow Christ it is as easy as ABC….. 

A. Admit that you are a sinner- Romans 3:23, 

B. Believe that Christ died for you- Acts 16:31 

C. Confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and be saved- Romans 10:9-10  

What do you thirst for?

 Today’s BRP is 1 Pet 2:6

        “On Christ the Solid Rock I stand, all other ground is sinking sand” do you remember that song? Or the kids song “He’s still working on me, to make me what I ought to be. Took Him just a week to make the moon and stars, the Sun and the Earth, and Jupiter and Mars. Oh how lucky for me, cause He’s still working on Me” Well, is He? Are you allowing Him to work on you? Is your foundation that of Christ? 

    I can tell on myself that that is not always the case for me, as trust is hard. You want to please and strive fervently to do so, only to not be appreciated or loved and undervalued. When we look through the world’s glasses and what it expects of us it is not the same as what you would see through God’s glasses, metaphorically of course, and what He expects of us. Why do we see someone or something and think that is what we want or what we you strive for cars, trucks, money, fashion in a style that makes each of us drool, the animals/pets, house(s), and the lifestyle. Now personalize the worldly things you want, they don’t have to be listed; how do your wants and desires line up with what God has for you? Are they? Now ask yourself what are the Godly things that you want and desire? Being the Proverbs 31 wife, being like Moses, Daniel, Ruth, wearing your armor, being the hands and feet of God. How are you matching up? Who do you relate to in the Bible? Are you indeed truly seeking to be as Christ?

Thirst and living stones

 BRP: 1 Peter 2:2-3 and 2:4-5

* Yesterday, I went to Church and at Sunday School we discussed 1 Peter 2:2-3, well more than that, but Sunday was my day away from here. That is not to say I didn’t learn or reflect on scripture, I just didn’t reflect it here Yesterday. 

        My husband and I have been visiting a church locally for around a year. We are members of another church in town, but we needed a different, more laid back church for my great aunt. We take her to church on the days that Brian is off. Here I go down a small rabbit hole….. I believe that you should grow where you are planted…. Generally, I am very adamant about this. However, I have been in a funk, you ever find yourselves in a funk? Not the I don’t believe in God funk but, more like the I don’t get it, don’t understand it, and the blahs overall. Often, times this life on Earth will cause trials, troubles and confusion. I guess I have been a bit of a pouty childish brat. Just going through the motions. Now, I know that God is an understanding God, He understands that we are human and fallible. We have wander through desert like moments and we also have moments on the mountain tops, where we can just embrace His Grace and Beauty while on the highs of life. So, know that wherever you are God sees you. He still longs for a relationship with YOU. Not one of the magic genies type relationships where we only speak to God when we want something but, He wants the relationship of an Amazing Father to His child(ren). One we speak with daily, One we tell and share everything with, One who comforts us and wipes our tears. One who disciplines his children out of love. The Prodigal Son- made foolish choices and slept with stinky pigs, yet when the son finally saw that his own way wasn’t working and went home…. The FATHER ran. He ran! To the stinky stubborn brat (which we can all relate too, can’t we) anyway… the son realized he could always go home. The father was waiting and watching for his beloved son to come home. Can you imagine your Heavenly Father running to you? Picking up your stinky self? Celebrating your return home? Well, I have been in the place of that prodigal. Down to the very bottom of the stank barrel. Well, I can tell you I still don’t understand how God can receive glory through those trials or hurts, but I am trying to get back on track with where He wants and needs me. Growing where I am planted. I have needed and been craving pure spiritual milk. Wanting to be close to Him and doing as He wants. 

     Back to I believe you should grow where you are planted. I understand that you might not be where you want to be, but are you growing there, or choosing to pout. We need to grow, and take in nutrients from God’s Holy word. In Sunday School and Church especially where you are, even if you aren’t a member there. However, pray and consider that might be where God wants you, not just being fed, but to also serve others. In whatever capacity you are able. Reaching out to others, being the hands and feet of God, praying for the lost and needs of your fellow believers. God has called us to be like is He is, He sees us as valuable, living stones, to build….. to build His spiritual house through Jesus. We really need to search who, what, when, where and why, we need to be in Christ. Be in prayer and be as God wants you.

I guess I will stop rambling now. Might do better phrasing tomorrow.

Called to rid yourself

Hey! Today, I am going to write the whole verse out, BRP 1 Peter 2:1 NIV

Therefore, rid yourselves of all malice and deceit, hypocrisy, envy, and slander of every kind.

Miriam Webster definition of these words, then my reflection.

Malice- 1. desire to cause pain, injury, or distress another 2. Intent to commit an unlawful act or cause harm without legal justification or excuse

Deceit- 1. The act of causing someone to accept as true or valid what is false or invalid 2. An attempt or device to deceive- trick 3 the quality of being dishonest or misleading: the quality of being deceitful

Hypocrisy- 1. a feigning to be what one is not or to believe what one does not: behavior that contradicts what one claims to believe or feel 2. An act or instance of hypocrisy 

Envy- 1. Painful or resentful awareness of an advantage enjoyed by another joined with a desire to possess the same advantage 2. Malice 3. An object of envious notice or feeling

Slander- 1. the utterance of false charges or misrepresentations which defame and damage another’s reputation 2. A false and defamatory oral statement about a person 

Woah! Woah! Ouch! I am afraid to let y’all know that I am not perfect, and I have at one point or another been guilty of these and sometimes at first without thinking about it, premeditation like.

While I have been and probably am to some extent guilty by definition of these, I truly am striving to be different. I know that over the course of my life I have let other down and hurt them, whether intentionally or not the damage is done. I am not sure if you are or have done any of these specifically, but I do know that each and everyone of us is a sinner. Does that mean I am trying to point the finger back at another absolutely not. Yet, when we are reading or trying to understand each other it is good to reflect on oneself and try not to judge to harshly. 

Why do we continue to fall short, to slip up? Well, I know that our sin nature is a big part of it, yet it isn’t the only reason.

Right now the big one, pun intended, is obesity—- hypocrisy. I as a believer truly think that The Holy Bible is 100% true. Well, if I look in the mirror and sometimes in the eyes of passerby, I see the reflection of an obese  woman. I have always been comfortable in my own skin, and generally do not care what others think of me. However, if I hold myself to the plum line of God, I am missing the mark. The seven deadly sins that are from the Bible Proverbs 6:16-19 pride, envy, gluttony, lust, anger, greed, and being slothful. This is not a full list, just a reference for the particular sin that God has me working on.

Since, the beginning of 2025 I have been working on better habits overall, not like a New Years’ resolution, but a lifestyle change and come to Jesus meeting. As I told you in a previous post I am kinda sick, due to that, I kinda without realizing it gave up. I had the mindset of why even care about your health just let yourself go and live your best lazy life while you are still here. Yet, here I am a couple years post being told I was sick. I do have days when it isn’t slothful-ness, I quite literally have migraines or can’t literally get out of bed. Yet, on the days I was able or felt decent I just vegged out. I felt that was acceptable. Well, in December I thought you can and should do better, as the obesity doesn’t help with movement nor over all health and worse than that it was dishonoring God. So, I started trying to make smaller food portions, I bought a food scale, I am logging what I eat, how much I eat, and caloric intake. Will I always weigh and count everything I do not know, but at least for now it is a start. On Wednesday, I downloaded a walking app called WALKFIT- I can use it in home, which is good for me sense right now I am not driving and it cost the same as a gym membership. I am striving to be someone who honors God in mind, body and spirit. So, far I am trying to keep my mind in a better attitude, my body healthier and being active in the word of God. It is a journey and I still mess up and my body is at times a hater, but as of today I have lost 20 lbs 4.4lbs was sense I downloaded the app on Wednesday. I hope that you are striving to do what God lays on your heart and if you slip up, try and try again.

Here today gone tomorrow

 Hey! Today’s BRP is 1Peter 1:24-25 

    Have you ever thought about how finite we are and how infinite God is comparatively. I do. In today’s verse he compares us to grass and flowers which wither and fall. This is so true of us; of God and His word, they remain FOREVER. 

        There are seasons in our life that are ever changing, there are so many examples of this. An example for my own life was my college journey. It definitely came in seasons, I was unable to commit to getting all my education at one time for various reasons, but those do not matter at this point. However, when one is striving to get their college degree there can be challenges and hurdles that arise. These issues can cause one to fill as if they will fail, or that it is taking the individual to long to achieve their end goal. Yet, when they accomplish the goal they are relieved, excited and happy. No longer does it seem as if the world is stacked against them. Often, after reaching a goal and looking back they might feel silly or wonder why at the time it felt like such a challenge or a flood they would never survive.

        Our mortal flesh as mankind is the same, we will one day come to and end. Yet, our deeds will remain, in the spiritual sense. Whether or not we are remembered centuries down the road is unlikely, but our spiritual selves will ever have a story and be known. Will your spiritual self have many if any crowns to lay at the feet of our Lord? If not, what can you do about it? If so, can you do more? Pray and ask God to show you areas that need to be improved, and areas that He wants you to cover. I myself have been challenged of recent to be more about God’s business and I am working on it in a couple different areas I will share with you later. For now it is getting quite late.

Change and Love

 Today’s BRP is 1 Peter 1:22-23 (just an fyi I know that I am not a theological master mind) these are just thoughts and reflections that I have as I study and try to apply God’s word)

             You have purified yourselves, by obeying the truth. A call to action! It does not say be lost in yourself, tv show, novel or games…. Purify yourselves and obey the truth. Then He states for you are born again, love one another deeply…. Again action!

              We have got to stay in the word in order to be purified. Purification is not something you can buy on Amazon and have immediately. You have to work at being purified. You have to work at humbling yourself to obedience. It makes me think of the oil/tar that can get on you and stick which is like sin. We can not just say oil be gone, or wipe it off. You must methodically work to remove it to be cleansed anew. If you follow direction you will have a better chance of that oil/tar/sin to be removed. Connecting this analogy with the call to action in verse 23, our brothers and sister can help us to be cleansed, to work together for a better chance of removing the oil/tar/sin from ourselves. We can also help them as they work to be clean. 

              In our actual life we have an instruction manual. We need to obey it. We are called  to purify ourselves through obedience, through change and change is not easy. We like being in our comfort zone and living in our comfy sin. Yet, we have to remember this life is not all about oneself it is about others. About God, Spouses, biological family and spiritual family and friends. If we do not purify ourselves we are selfish. In purifying obedience this we can see and meet the needs of others, oftentimes without foreknowledge that there is a need. What if we continue to sit on the sidelines while a brother or sister is at the end of their rope? I do not want to fail anymore of my family or friends by sitting idly whilst others around me are drowning.

            I know that I have not always done what I have needed nor been obedient to the cause of Christ. But I am working to change that. I know that in the past I have helped others, I also know I have failed others for that I will ever have a scar, and shame. I am sorry to all of you that I have let down or missed an opportunity to help. I am limited now in some ways that keep me from doing certain things, but obviously God is not done with me being here on Earth. SOOO, I am seeking to be continually cleansed, to see how I, though limited, can be the hands and feet of Jesus! I know I can pray, I know that I can encourage and I know I can continue to be purified and obey. I want to be able to love others as Christ has called me.

It might be difficult to do, for you too, just remember God meets us where we are, when we seek Him and when we trust Him!

Also, remember we are to LOVE DEEPLY, that means as Christ does. Not with piety, haughtiness nor begrudging others, just because someone’s sin and fault is different than yours, sin all sin of any kind separates from God. Show compassion, grace and love to others… not to their sin, but to them. We are doing the best we can, but we can and must do better. There are family, peers and lost that are counting on each and everyone of us. Pray and ask God to show you where you need to grow, where you need to change and how to love more deeply.

Faith and Hope

            Yesterday, I did a post which was playing catch up from the BRP (Bible Reading Plan). Today the BRP was 1Pet.1:20-21

            Faith and hope are in God: Do you ever stop to think about what, why and how we are here? The purpose? The abilities we are given, especially in being a child of God? I thought about these again today as I was reminded…. We are, because of God. We are here because He desires a relationship with us, and wants us to worship Him, not as slaves before an unjust and cruel master, but of a Just and Gracious  Loving Father. He knew that we would be a fallible group of beings, knowing too what it would cost Him. Even still He desires a relationship with us. He knew that we could never measure up or have the ability to save ourselves. 

          Just as a parent knows that in life their child will face challenges of many kinds, a parent has foresight to know bumpy days will be ahead. The parent also, learns to know their children and knows what works best for each child. Ex: My dad has said, “when it came to you girls (3 of us) your older sister I could ‘spank her or bonk her with a 2x4’ and she was still going to do what she wanted”. (No, he didn’t ever actually clock her with a 2x4). Dad would then of my younger sister say, “child, I am disappointed in you” or have a disappointed face and that would essentially shatter her to the core. The older child needed discipline, but she also needed to find her own way, granted it might’ve come with added struggles, and falls along the way, but as her dad he had to let her be herself to a certain extent. She is now a beautiful woman, with a family of her own. She learned from her dad things to do and not do, which allowed her to shape 3 amazing biological sons, and 2 amazing bonus sons. The younger daughter needed simply to see a disappointed parent’s face or to be verbally told that she had done something that displeased them in order to be corrected, then she would strive then to do better. She is now a beautiful woman of two beautiful children a girl and a boy. She too took away things to do and not do as a parent and is trying to raise her children to be their best selves. (I am not sure what parenting strategy he thought to use for me or what I needed, but for the most part I turned out alright). 

         However, hard my dad might try he couldn’t be a perfect dad, as he is human and makes human mistakes. Yet, this quote of my dad reminds me of our Heavenly Father, He perfectly knows if we are ‘2x4 kids, or a disappointed look on the face kids, etc.’ to know how we need to be corrected and grown as the best version of our selves. All of us girls needed our own style of discipline from our dad to know what was right or wrong and when he had to let us try no training wheels, being close by if we began to wobble or be afraid. Also, dad was there when the training wheels did come off and picking us up, wiping tears or dirt and helping us to try again. 

          God is the same, though He is the perfect parent, we are not perfect. Occasionally, the holes we fall in our holes we dug and fell in. God carefully watches over us but allows us to try it our own way. Or till we notice we are the one holding the shovel, shaking it at God and asking Him, WHY?!?!? Why we are in the hole, he must have put us in it. Eventually, we see our error, then we have to cling to Him to get out of the hole, He was always there a call/prayer away. Other times God has holes along our path that we must go through, to get to the other side growing us just as Joseph, the coat of many colors guy, he literally was in a hole and went through many trials because God ordained it in order for Joseph to not provide for his family, and to bring God glory. We try so hard to figure out the why of the situation instead of The Who of the situation, are we the one Who put us there, or Who do we need to cling to, Who we need to repent to, Who we are becoming through the trial(s) of life.

          Regardless of who you are you will have trials, never forget that God is always with you, whether you are in a hole of your own making or in one that He is trying to teach you in HE IS THERE. You will have trials it is only a matter of when. Also, remember that we are each different and God treats us as such. Just because your friends’ trials, through your eyes, do not compare to the severity of your own trial; try and remember God knows our inner most workings. He knows the ones of us that need the 2x4 and those that need the disappointed look. I am obviously a 2x4 person and I am like Jonah a runner. So wherever you are in your walk, God is there. If you are an unbeliever, God is there. God see us and meets us right where we are. Whatever you have done or are doing that is offending God, He still loves and wants you. There is not a power in this world or existence that can change that. If you feel unworthy or that you have sunk so far that God can’t love you or what love if you call out to Him….. Trust me my friend YOU ARE NOT THAT POWERFUL. Granted He will never make you choose Him, but like the prodigal son He wants you to come home regardless of how messed up you are. I am a child, a person who can attest to this truth, His Grace Still Amazes ME!